<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>the still of your hand by championstunic</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22791196">the still of your hand</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/championstunic/pseuds/championstunic'>championstunic</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Hands, Kind of Abstract, M/M, Very little dialogue, slight manga spoilers up to chapter 379, tbh there's not much of a plot</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 17:41:27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,820</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22791196</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/championstunic/pseuds/championstunic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p></p><blockquote>
  <p>It wasn’t until the kid from Squad Two intervened that he realized this wasn’t actually true. Over time, Kourai showed Sachirou how to break the shackles around his wrists and love his hands again.</p>
</blockquote>Or: A very gradual progression of Hoshiumi showing Hirugami that there's more to life than volleyball.
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hirugami Sachirou/Hoshiumi Kourai</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>100</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the still of your hand</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i figured it was about time that i wrote some hiruhoshi/hoshihiru so when @yellowwclouds on twitter shared a prompt list for hoshihiru week, it seemed like the perfect time to do so! this is for day 2, and the prompt was "hands." i hope you enjoy!!!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>In middle school, Sachirou grew to hate his hands.</p><p>It wasn’t always like that. When he first began playing volleyball, he was grateful for his hands. The ball felt almost like an extension of himself, in a way, and he couldn’t imagine a day without one in his hands. They were bigger than the other kids’, and they made it easy for him to palm the ball or block a spike. His teammates would tell him that they were jealous of his height and size, and he’d reply that volleyball was in his DNA.</p><p>In middle school, though, the volleyball started to feel unnatural in his hands. The more time he spent holding, spiking, or serving one, the worse he felt. But, he knew he had to keep going. He told himself that he just had to continue working until it started to feel right again and he refused to stop until he felt weird when he <em> wasn’t </em> holding a ball. In order to be the best, he couldn’t make any more mistakes. In order to keep himself from making more mistakes, he had to spend as much time with a volleyball as possible.</p><p>Yet, no matter how hard he worked and how much he practiced, he continued to make stupid mistakes. Sachirou couldn’t understand why. He was doing everything he was supposed to, yet his hands wouldn’t do what he needed them to. It was their fault that he wasn’t good enough. It was their fault that he couldn’t connect with his team. </p><p>It wasn’t until the kid from Squad Two intervened that he realized this wasn’t actually true. Over time, Kourai showed Sachirou how to break the shackles around his wrists and love his hands again.</p><p>The day after Kourai confronted him on the street and stopped him from hurting himself, Sachirou found himself wandering over to Squad Two during their lunch break.</p><p>“You’re still here. So you’re not quitting?” Kourai asked, raising an eyebrow. </p><p>“I don’t think I will quite yet,” Sachirou replied, holding his hands behind his back.</p><p>“How’s your hand? Can I see it?”</p><p>Sachirou hesitated before slowly holding his hand out, his palm facing up. Kourai took it in his own and turned it over, examining the scratches. His movements were steady and confident. That was the first time Kourai held Sachirou’s hand.</p><p>Kourai frowned before looking back up at Sachirou defiantly. “You have to swear you won’t do this to yourself again. And I’m gonna hold you to that!”</p><p>Sachirou was taken aback. All those nights he’d seen the small kid from Squad Two practicing on his own and all those practices when he’d noticed him silently playing ball boy, he never expected him to be so bold and confrontational, especially towards Sachirou. Normally, Sachirou would be annoyed but, to his surprise, he didn’t mind.</p><p>“I swear, I won’t do it again,” he said, raising his right hand. He paused, watching the other kids milling around and talking to each other. Finally, he turned to Kourai. “I usually practice during the break, but I’m actually hungry today. Do you want to eat together?”</p><p>Kourai looked over his shoulder at the net, then looked back at Sachirou. “I was actually planning on working on my serves right now, but… sure, I will.”</p><p>With that, the two of them began eating lunch together every day. Kourai claimed it was so that he could keep an eye on Sachirou and make sure he was no longer hurting himself. The first few times, he would demand that Sachirou show him his hands and, together, they watched his knuckles heal. Afterwards, if Kourai noticed so much as a paper cut, he would reprimand Sachirou. </p><p>However, Kourai eventually stopped asking about Sachirou’s hands. They ate together because they enjoyed each other’s company. They talked about things other than volleyball: their families, how annoying their siblings were, that week’s issue of Jump. Sachirou showed Kourai pictures of his dog while Kourai shared his bag of Kappa Ebisen. </p><p>They began walking home together after practices. When Sachirou found himself falling back into his old attitude, Kourai would scold him. Each time they passed the wall where they spoke for the first time, Sachirou’s knuckles ached, and he was reminded of the things that Kourai told him. </p><p>He became increasingly comfortable around Kourai as he found himself smiling more often. He even began teasing Kourai for being so easily provoked, but he also admitted to himself that it was cute when he got excited.</p><p>Kourai knew Sachirou’s fears and insecurities, so it was only natural that Sachirou would learn Kourai’s too. Sachirou found out that Kourai hated being underestimated because of his size, that he hated to lose, and that he was willing to work as hard as he needed to in order to win.</p><p>By the time they began at the same high school, Sachirou considered Kourai to be his best friend.</p><p>On the first day of high school volleyball, Kourai looked up at Sachirou.</p><p>“Are you ready to quit yet?”</p><p>Sachirou looked down at his right hand, flexing his fingers and observing the scars on his knuckles. “You know what Kourai-kun? I think I’ll wait it out just a little bit longer,” he replied, smiling.</p><p>Sachirou went through high school as a changed person. It was his fresh start. Thanks to Kourai, he knew that it was okay to take things slowly. He managed to let himself enjoy volleyball again, and he found it easy with Kourai beside him.</p><p>He watched as Kourai improved. He spent evenings teaching him how to jump serve and overhand pass. Kourai’s eyes were always laser-focused on Sachriou’s hands as he demonstrated techniques he’d learned about years ago from books and old coaches. Sachirou was glad that he had the opportunity to see Kourai’s improvement from the ball boy in middle school to someone that their teammates began to call a “little giant.” He felt instrumental in his growth, and he was sure that, soon enough, Kourai would surpass him in skill.</p><p>Kourai told Sachirou he wanted to become a professional volleyball player after high school. Before he told him, he had made Sachirou swear that he wouldn’t laugh, but at that moment, no part of Sachirou wanted to laugh or poke fun at Kourai. He knew that Kourai could do anything he set his mind to and he was eager to see him achieve his dream.</p><p>On the other hand, Sachirou found himself unsure of what he wanted to do next. For so long, he was certain he would also join the V Leagues. But, after he met Kourai he realized that there were other options. He just didn’t know which one he wanted to pursue. </p><p>“What do you like? What do you feel happy doing?” Kourai asked, eyes wide.</p><p>Sachirou thought about it for a moment before jokingly replying, “Playing with my dog.”</p><p>“Then do that. Take care of animals for a living.”</p><p>Sachirou was surprised. He had been facetious, but Kourai seemed serious. “What, like a vet? Veterinarian Hirugami Sachirou?” </p><p>Kourai nodded enthusiastically. “Exactly.”</p><p>Truthfully, Sachirou didn’t hate the way that it sounded. He’d always loved animals, and when he had been stressed out by volleyball, his dog provided some of the comfort he needed. He looked down at his hands. Kourai thought Sachirou could use these hands he had hated so much in order to help animals and make people happy. Maybe he was right.</p><p>By their second year of high school, the two of them were almost a set. While each of them were powerful on their own, the rest of the team acknowledged them as the backbone of their “serve and block” strategy. When Sachirou was at the net, knowing that Kourai was serving behind him made him feel invincible (except for the times when Kourai served the ball straight into the back of his head). With Kourai on the court with him, Sachirou felt unburdened. He smiled and joked during matches. When he told his teammates “don’t mind,” he actually meant it.</p><p>One evening after scenario practice, Sachirou and Kourai sat in a corner of the gym as Kourai taped Sachirou’s fingers. </p><p>“I keep telling you to take care of your hands, Sachirou,” Kourai scolded, carefully wrapping the tape.</p><p>Sachirou laughed. “You’re one to talk. After tooling my block, this is basically your fault.”</p><p>Kourai just stuck out his tongue in response and continued working, steadily focusing on Sachirou’s hands.</p><p>Kourai’s hands never shook when he taped Sachirou’s. He was always slow and deliberate with his movement. Watching Kourai calmly make progress and looking at his own knuckles stirred something in Sachirou.</p><p>“Kourai-kun?” he said eventually.</p><p>“Hm?”</p><p>“I like you. I was gonna say ‘I think I like you,’ but I’m sure of it and I don’t want to beat around the bush. I like you as more than a friend.”</p><p>Kourai stopped moving and stared down at the ground. He was still holding Sachirou’s hand. Sachirou thought maybe he shouldn’t have confessed so bluntly, but he didn’t regret saying it.</p><p>“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way,” he added. “I just figured I had to tell you.”</p><p>“I like you, too,” Kourai said suddenly, looking back up and tightly gripping Sachirou’s hand. “This is the first time I’ve said it aloud, but I like you, too, Sachirou.”</p><p>Ever since he met Kourai in middle school, Sachirou had begun to feel a weight slowly lift off of his shoulders. After finding out that his feelings for Kourai were mutual, the final burden lifted away and he was completely unshackled. He wanted to lift Kourai up into the air and kiss him in the middle of the gym, but plenty of their teammates were still there and he knew that Kourai would kill him if he even tried to pick him up. </p><p>Instead, he vowed to kiss him on their walk home, when nobody else would be around. Slowly, he linked their fingers together, internally cursing the tape Kourai had just finished wrapping because it kept him from fully experiencing the feeling of holding Kourai’s hand. However, he felt solace in knowing that this wasn’t the first time Kourai held his hand.</p><p>For once, Sachirou found himself speechless. He wanted to thank Kourai. He wanted to tell him how much he meant to him. He wanted to explain that part of the reason he still played volleyball was because of Kourai and he wanted to shout his feelings for the whole gym to hear. His new image as someone who was always composed and level-headed would be ruined, but he didn’t care. </p><p>There was so much he wanted to say and do, but Sachirou didn’t know where to start. He knew that when he was with Kourai, he was free. Thanks to him, Sachirou finally learned to love his hands, because with them, he could hold Kourai’s.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you for reading and thank you <a href="https://twitter.com/manyangrygeese">cam</a> for beta-reading this for me!! please let me know your thoughts in the comments, or you can find me on <a href="https://twitter.com/vethirugami">twitter</a> and <a href="https://tvxit.tumblr.com/">tumblr</a>!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>